Showing posts with label hugs. Show all posts
Showing posts with label hugs. Show all posts

Friday, October 19, 2007

what did i do last night?

Last night I cried.
I laid down next to Greg.
And I talked and cried and got things out.
I let myself be vulnerable and I did not censor myself.
And my eyes were swollen and red.
And my nose was all runny.
And I talked about my flaws and my weaknesses and some fears.
And he held my hand and hugged me and talked too.
Now I feel less pressure and less tension.
And I feel better and I know I am loved.


DSC05994
Originally uploaded by misslissa13

Thursday, August 2, 2007

dreams and waking

I often have dreams involving buildings, houses usually. Ones that I have never seen/experienced in waking life. Last night I had one about a house which had a section of my parents backyard and a dining room/kitchen like a beautiful Gilded Age hotel of sorts. It was white marble and bright with a mirror backsplash and was filled with friends and loved ones who were not people from waking life. I was preparing and serving a meal to welcome these friends and many of them were greeting me with hugs. I embodied the comfort of each embrace and the joy of being able to treat these folks with kindness and hospitality. I was able to readily receive their love and appreciation. Some embraces felt like home and incredibly nurturing, and nurturing is something I feel I thrive on in life, both providing and receiving.

What a pleasure to be able to conjure this from the recesses of my mind, especially after the difficult evening I experienced. Spine out, body temperature high and unwavering, mild yet consistent headache, emotional meltdown and the inability to readily fall asleep. Luckily, I slept rather "flat" and my spine is feeling quite a bit better this morning. I still feel warm and muscle-knotty, and still a little crooked spined. When I finally drifted into sleep, it was deep and solid, but the alarm screamed at me much too soon, forcing me into some weak state of awake. I am still a bit foggy but I am relying on the gifts from Juan Valdez now and I have acupuncture later.