toes should not be these colors

It is simply amazing what I am capable of doing to myself. Only I can cause my toes to not only have a faint base of black and blue, but also add a ring of purple and a splat of jet black. But, come on, how can you possibly expect me to see the giant three seat couch sitting conspicuously against the wall and not in the normal path of walking?

 

Yeah, yeah, yeah, once a klutz, always a klutz! Yes, I am the same person who stabbed their own foot with a pitch fork when I was 8 years old.