Friday, July 27, 2012

prayers for thy enemy

(By pray I mean any sort of positive thoughts, vibes or mojo, and by enemy I'm even including people that irritate you or are on your bad side temporarily.)

Why would you want to pray for someone you don't particularly like? Because it is incredibly healing and helps both you and that person. Better karma to boot!

This is a lesson I learned years ago but I admit I often have to remind myself to do it since it's certainly not always easy and is much easier to ignore. Now, I'm not talking about praying for a flat tire for the person who directed their road rage at you. I am talking about praying that whatever is triggering their road rage dissipates so they have no further need to explode and flip people off.

Ironically, I learned this idea from a former coworker who was really irritating. You know the type of person who always "one ups" you? That was her. No matter what someone else talked about, she's done it and it was twenty times more exciting. If you went kayaking on a nice calm river, she kayaked during a typhoon and saved a drowning muskrat in the process. She would steel the spotlight in every conversation. Irritating? Very. One day, she told me how she would pray for the people she liked the least because it was a good thing to do. I thought about it for a while and decided to give it a try. I began including her in my prayers and it surprisingly helped me gain empathy for her. Perhaps she felt inadequate and needed to boost her own ego. Perhaps no one in her family ever let her tell her stories and she jumps on the opportunity to share her life's adventures with people. Perhaps she grew up in a family that didn't teach her good communication skills. Whatever the reason, I prayed she would feel better and learn good conversation manners so others would not be turned off by her. After praying for her a few times (first begrudgingly, then with more ease), her "one up-ing" didn't trigger irritation in me anymore. Nice bonus, right?
Isn't that a much nicer way to live? Praying for positive things to happen to people, friend or foe? Give it a try. It doesn't really take much time or effort and you might be surprised at the outcome.

4 comments:

Stevie G.B. said...

OH. I try to pray for my enemies but it's not working. they are still around..ugh..

Xpressive Handz said...

I love your attitude. I've been following your blog for some time. I nominated your blog for the "One Lovely Blog Award". You can read more about that over at my own blog: http://xpressivehandz.blogspot.com/2012/08/one-lovely-blog-award.html

Joyce

Melissa said...

Stevie - Try praying to multiple gods, it's bound to work eventually. Joyce - Thank you so much, that is very sweet of you.

Xpressive Handz said...

It is my pleasure! I'm so glad I stumbled across your blog.