Thursday, April 21, 2011

i'm gonna do it! aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh

What makes us move forward? What motivates us to jump in with or without fear to any task that is in front of us? What is the catalyst that propels us into the abyss? As those of you who read my other blog, finding maitri (send me your email address to be able to gain access), you know I am dealing with some "stuff." And though this stuff is by no means positive, I have noticed it has really prompted me to treat myself with greater lovingkindness.
Over the years, I notice that there are different motivating factors in my mind. In my youth, being the first girl in predominantly boy-filled activities was a huge factor. Tell me that girls shouldn't do something and I'd be damned if I didn't prove you wrong. I've been motivated by love by trying to be the best me I could be to help the "us" be better. Anger has prompted me to be proactive. Both anger towards myself (not very "maitri-like" I know) at not doing whatever the task is and anger towards injustices put upon others. I suppose the motivating factor now is a combination of "wake up call" and fear. Part of me enjoys sitting with the uneasiness of the unknown and anxiety and I have cleaned up my diet tremendously.

The positive thing is the moving forward, being proactive and getting things done. I believe that no matter what the motivation, anything that prompts positive action is a good thing.

Now it's time for me to jump! I will let you know how it goes.


Jane said...

I would love to follow along on your other blog as well. Let me just say that I've been needing to take some big leaps for years and years and years now. I find that the more I hold it all in, the worse it gets for me physically and mentally as stress and anxiety have a way of taking over in nasty ways as a result. I've finally reached a point where I am ready to leap. Really ready to leap because I know there is so much goodness waiting for me if I only dare to grab it. Happy Monday!

Melissa said...

I sent you an invite to the email linked to your blog. Let me know if you didn't get it.

I definitely go through waves with motivation. Sometimes my motivation is very high and I can tackle almost anything. Other times I am in a state of stuckness.