Thursday, October 18, 2007

would you like dressing with that?

I think I am suffering some form of Alan Shore's word salad, except that it is not my spoken word that is messed up, I think my brain just does not have the ability to comprehend words or function properly....and I am not James Spader. I know I have mentioned some of this in my previous posts but I think there are multiple reasons for this. I have been having some difficulty with sleep: waking up too early, being tired but oddly awake when I get into bed and I even conked out on the couch after work yesterday. So I am oh-so-tired. I am sure all the noise and stuff in the air at work is whacking my mind out too. Listen to a jackhammer cracking cement for hours on end is even enough to irritate the Buddha, if you ask me. Plus, the burning eyes cause additional distraction. I have been a little bit on the sick side, so my body is "off" that way too. (One would think that the doctor's office would, I don't know, actual call back and tell you the course of treatment but why would I think they would do their job??? No need for alarm, this is nothing major by any means. Just annoying and making me feel blah.) Top all this with the typical stress of job hunting and planning the move makes for a discombobulated Melissa-brain.

One example of how bad this is getting: I was over at the girls' shelter, which is one of the locations I do therapy. The staff was in a whirlwind of busy, so when the phone rang I answered for them. It was another staff member who is extremely articulate. She spoke clearly yet none of the words were computing in my brain. I asked her to repeat them, but I just could not get it. I handed the phone off in the midst of my confusion. Thank god the staff members that were there have a good sense of humor. I also do not seem to have the drive or the mind power to focus on all the paperwork I need to complete before I leave. Senior moments in my 30s? I doubt it. I just think my body and mind are simply taxed right now. Of course, taking a day off would do me a world of good, but can I really do that when I only have 2.5 weeks left? Two more days until the weekend. I think I can hack it...I know I can hack it...just maybe not to the best of my ability. Perhaps I will take a walk after work, come home and relax and get to bed early so my mind will get back to some semblance of sharpness. Here's to hoping!

So, have you ever felt this way or is it just me?

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